I HATE MEN AND I NO LONGER ENJOY SEX.

Getting letters from my fans is always exciting, this week we received a very special Story from a young woman lived in Tanzania - East Africa.

Hi sporah! when i was in form 3 my teacher alinipa mimba,my dad alipogundua am pregnant alinifukuza home na kwa bahati mbaya my step mom dont like me so i had no support kweli nikaondoka home to mwenye mimba luckly he told me i dont have to worry he will marry me, so nikabak kwake for sometime bila my family kujua where exactly nilipokua. After a while dad akaanza kunitafuta then akajua ninapokaa by the time mimba ilikua na 7 months dad akanambia amenisamehe.

Basi nilivosamehewa mkaka akaona ndo right time ya kwenda home na ndugu zake kujitambulisha na kunitolea mahari. They paid pride price so sikurud home nikaendelea kukaa na mkaka God is good nikajifungua a beautiful baby gal unaweza kumuona kwenye photo zangu.nikamnyonyesha for mwaka na nusu then nikatoa two ideas kwa mkaka, kwamba i wish tubarik ndoa kanisan pili i told him nataka kurud shule, akakubali vyote then he asked me tuanze kipi.

Nikaomba ushauri to my family kua what should i go first wakanishaur nibarik ndoa then ndo niende shule coz i was supposed kwenda boarding school ili nisiwe na majukumu ya family na shule at the same time tukabariki ndoa in sept 2006 na 2007 nikarudi shule in form 4 remember nilistop in form 3. My God is good i did well in my studies advance nikachaguliwa government school na muda wote my hubby alikua ananisupport sana he even paid my school fees, form 5 nilisoma vzr sana, things started to change form 6.

Basi nikiwa form 6 akaanza kuchange akawa hapigi simu wala hanitext mpaka nimuanze na sometimes hata nikianza akawa hapokei sim zangu wala hareply msg zangu i had no choice zaidi ya kua mpole na kusubiri nimaliza shule ndo nirudi home nikaone kinachoendelea. Ikiwa bado 1 week kumaliza mtihani nilimuomba anitumie nauli akanijibu hana pesa labda nisubiri baada ya 2 weeks, bahati nzr i had some money so nilivomaliza mtihani nikaamua kurud kwangu bila kumwambia.

Nilipofika nikaambiwa kasafir kikaz, home tulikua tunaishi na mtoto wa sister ake na my baby na ndo niliwakuta nyumbani, master bedroom na chumba cha wagen kulikua locked but kilichonishangaza zaid ni sitting room nilikuta family pictures zote hazipo kasoro moja tu ya baby girl akiwa peke yake. Nnikamuuliza binti picha zimeenda wap akanijibu baba alitoa, akili yangu ikaniambia something is wrong somewhere nikaamua kuvunja kitasa cha room kwetu unajua nilichokikuta mamii?

Nilikuta vitu vyangu vyote havipo chumban kwetu vipo vyake tu, nikiwa bado nashangaa nikaona funguo za chumba cha wagen nilipokifungua nikakuta vitu vyangu ndo vimefungiwa huko. Kesho yake nikafanya usaf room kwetu nikarudishia vitu vyangu, after 2days tangu nimefika akarud nyumban. Alistuka sana kuniona nikanyamaza nione what will be his next move cha ajabu hakunisalimia wala nini akaenda chumban akaingia bafun kuoga akalala. Sikutaka kumsumbua kwa maswali ucku huo coz nilihisi anawezakua amechoka na safari.

Bac asbh ilipofika i asked him tatizo nin he replied hakuna tatizo, cku zikasonga akawa anarudi home ucku sana kila cku, bac cku moja alisahau his wallet wakati anaenda kazn, inside the wallet kulikua na cm card tofauti za zile cm card zake ninazozjua. Nikaweka ile cm card in my phone nikakuta love msgs kwenye inbox na sent items pia. Nikachukua

namba za msichana aliekua anachart nae, it took me week nzima kufikiria what step should i take.. na ckumwambia kama najua kua ananicheat. Basi after a week nikaamua kumcall yule msichana, alivopokea simu yangu nikajitambulisha kua naitwa fulani ni mke wa fulani. I told her najua kua unarelationshp na mume wangu, chaajabu hata hakubisha she asked me niko wapi.

Nikamwambia nipo kwangu, akashangaa then she asked if we can meet cku inayofuata,nikakubali.we met sikuinayofuata. She came alone ila mimi i was with my baby girl, tukasalimiana, then i asked her kama anajua kua mwanaume anaetoka nae kua huyo mwanaume wake ni mume wa mtu? Akajibu yes bt she told me kwamba my hubby told her that 'mke wangu alitoroka miaka 4 iliyopita na sijui yuko wapi'.!

End of the day we separated maana he told me amechoka kuishi na mimi as for me nilivoona mateso na manyanyaso yamezidi nikaamua kuondoka ma niliondoka na mtoto wangu, fun enough he never called my parents to explain why kanirudisha home na wala hajawahi kuja kwetu na tangu nimeondoka kwake ni miaka miwili now. Sasa nina miaka 26 nasoma chuo naingia mwaka wa tatu. After what i have been through nafikiri kisaikolojia nimekua affected I HATE MEN and i no longer enjoy SEX. Wanaume weng wananitaka but naona wote waongo wanataka tu kunichezea.

Thanx much Sporah. nimejisikia vizuri baada ya kukusimulia coz sijawahi kumsimulia mtu ambae sio mwanafamilia. hope umeielewa kidogo maana kusimulia kwa maandishi ni kazi sana

THE TRANSLATION:

Hi Sporah! At form 3 my teacher impregnated me; when my Dad discovered, I was driven out of home; and unfortunately my Step mom disliked me so handed me no support.

Luckily the Father of my unborn child let me into his home and promised to marry me; so I stayed with him for sometime without my family’s knowledge of my where-abouts. Seven months on, my Father had a change of heart and decided to look for me; and forgave me, even after finding out who I found refuge in.

My informal fiancé thought this would be the right time for him to make it formal by properly introducing himself to my family and pay the Bride Price. As it was official, I didn’t see the point of going back to my Father’s house; so stayed at my ‘official’ soon to be Husband’s house. God is Great, two months later we welcomed a Beautiful baby girl.

After a Year of Breast feeding, I thought maybe it was time to Bless the relationship by having a church wedding then I could also go back to school. He and my family were very supportive. In 2007, we thought it was best that I attended Boarding school, to strengthen my focus, away from family responsibilities, after the church wedding in September 2006. In God’s Greatness, I did well enough to be selected to a Government advance school and my Husband was still very supportive; from covering my fees to making sure I was taken care of in general.

Everything was Great, until form 6 when I stopped hearing from him. He also neither picked up my calls nor replied my texts. I couldn’t really do anything as I needed him to keep paying for my school fees. A week before the end of term, I asked him to please send me the transport fare to get back home, he told me to wait two weeks as he didn’t have any money at the time. Luckily, I had a little savings of my own, so decided to go back home without informing him. 

During my school time, we asked his niece to move in, to help with the house work and the baby; who informed me that my husband was away on a business trip when I got back.

It felt weird in my own home, as I looked around and a few things had been changed and moved around. Also noticed our wedding and family pictures were no longer in the lounge, all removed apart from my daughter’s pictures; his niece informed me that my husband took them off, and also locked the master bedroom and the guestroom. 

Now, I really needed to know what had been going on in this house and why things were changed; so decided to break the bedroom doors. Only to find all my stuff had been moved from our marital bedroom and packed in the Guest room.

Though still in shock, the next day, I cleaned the master bedroom and placed all my things back.

I was still quite upset and shocked, so said nothing to him when he got back 2 days later, plus I figured he must have been exhausted from the trip so wanted him to rest first.To my surprise, he didn’t have anything to say to me either, he went straight to bed.

In the morning, I asked him if there was anything we needed to talk about and he told me there wasn’t; but as days went by, he kept coming home after everyone had gone to bed.

One day, he forgot his wallet when he left for work; inside there was a different phone Sim-card with the number I wasn’t familiar with. As I went through the phone line using my phone, I was upset and shocked to find love messages from another woman. It took me a whole week, but finally gathered courage to get in touch with the other woman who was amazed to hear that I was in my husband’s house because as far as she knew, I was no longer in the picture.

She asked if we could meet up and talk; wanting to know what was going on, I agreed. She came alone and I showed up with my Daughter. 

She told me she knew that the man she was dating was married, but he had told her that he had no knowledge of my whereabouts since the day I ran away from my marriage 4 years back, and left him all alone with our only child; and so was no longer in the picture.

When confronted, he had no further explanations than he was just tired of being with me; and as I had had enough, decided to move out with our daughter, back to my parent’s house. It’s been two years now since I moved out, but he hasn’t either rang my parents to explain himself or come to see his child.

I’m 26 years old now, in my third year of University. I thank God for getting me this far education-wise and keeping me strong through all this. My love life is just not as fortunate; as I absolutely HATE MEN and no longer enjoy Sex. I just can’t let Love in my life again because I don’t know how to trust men anymore.

Anyway, I appreciate your time, It definitely helps to let it out.
Translation By Linda Kapinga

1. 
   

   Thank You Very Much For Sharing Your Private Story With Us

   
   

   You Are Really A Champion. 

   Your Letter To Sporah Is A Remarkable And Touching Inspiration For All Of Us.

   Good Luck In Everything That You Do, I Wish You All The Luck In The World. Just Enjoy Your Family, You Deserve Everything That Is Coming Your Way. 

   Godbless. 

   
   

DO YOU HAVE YOUR OWN TOUCHING & INSPIRING STORY TO TELL?

LOVE STORY, VIOLENCE, SEXUAL ABUSE, OR ANY DISASTER STORIES? 

HAVE YOU EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS AND REGRET IT? OR PURSUE YOUR DREAMS AND IT SUCCEEDED? 

WE WANT TO HEAR YOUR STORIES AND INSPIRE MORE MUCH PEOPLE WITH YOUR STORIES! YOUR STORY MIGHT HELP ANOTHER PERSON IN OVERCOMING CHALLENGES.

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